Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Folds and Pages

She was almost falling asleep.  Right there, at the brink. Slipping into the world of sub consciousness, of strange dreams. I love you, she heard. Her eyes opened on their own, without her permission. Like they wanted to know before she did. Her eyes gazed into his. Deeply, questioning the phrase she heard. I’ve never loved anyone truly, he had said a while ago. But there he lay, holding her like a precious gift in his arms, saying those very words to her. Never had a moment been so precious to her. She wanted to say something, but the words never left her mouth. It had never been that way; she could always say the things she wanted. Always, even if she didn’t mean it. But this once that she really did, it refused. Like grey clouds that refused to pour, looking for the right place, the right moment to shower down she held it on. No moment could compare to what she had just experienced. So she looked on, into those eyes that were imploring into hers trying to understand what turmoil was going on behind that distant gaze that she had. Are you serious, she asked finally and immediately regretted it. What a silly question, she shouldn’t have opened that mouth of hers. He laughed and held her tighter. Their faces now millimeters away from each other.  In that hot room that wasn’t hers, they were breathing the same air , breathing each other in and as if for the very first time. Their hands and minds needed no introduction to each other though. Since the first time they touched, it was like Déjà vu, she knew every nook, every fold of skin on his body.. that mole on the right side of his neck. And he knew her like he knew his books, cover to cover. His fingertips created electricity and his lips discovered her a little more everytime. It was a moment out of a story, she thought in retrospect. A story you never will forget, almost like it happened to you. This time for a change, she wasn’t reading. It was happening to her, her story, their story, unfolding like the most beautiful piece of literature written.

You make me want to write love stories, she said to him.

Are you serious, he asked. 

Regret

It's that time of the year again, when we come so close to losing someone that we realize what their proximity meant to us. Everybody is sniffing loudly, scrunching up their small puffy eyes, closing them every now and then and wondering.. what if. 'What if I had told her how much she meant to me' 'What if I just went to him when he asked me for something' 'What if I held her one last time before she went away forever' 'What if I hadn't said that....would she be here now?' No she wouldn't. Nothing we do and think is going to bring back anything about this person. We know this, yet...

(Lost and Found, August 2013)