Truly Mine.

“The winds that sometimes take something we love, are the same that bring us something we learn to love. Therefore we should not cry about something that was taken from us, but, yes, love what we have been given. Because what is really ours is never gone forever.”
― Bob Marley

I looked at his pictures on facebook, flipped through them angrily because he had made so many new friends and because I didn't feel a part of his life anymore. I stopped at a group picture and went through the tags to see what these new people were called. My cursor stopped at a girl who looked much like a bunny with bulging eyes and a goofy smile, but more than her looks, her name made me stop and think for a while and days to come later. Arya Anuranjitha. This girl shared first names with my first boyfriend, my first real love. How peculiar.

For two years, my ex's namesake still remained a face on a picture for me. Until the 13th of May 2011 happened. I packed my bags and ran off from the city I once loved the most because all it gave me then, was pain, despair and turned backs. So, I turned my back too and fled to a little town full of strangers.

Who knew strangers could be exactly what you needed?

Me: Even I've been wanting a tattoo forever.
Her: Me too man. There's this one phrase I want to get..
Me: Ya, which one? I've been wanting the phrase 'This too shall pass' for God knows how long
Her: Dude, are you kidding me? That's exactly what I want.

I swear, I have NEVER looked into a girl's eyes for longer. For me, time froze for those few seconds. That phrase was mine and that tattoo idea was mine too. That moment challenged all my ideas of, you need to know someone long enough to connect and yada yada yada. Arya, you piece of God knows what, you dropped into my life exactly when I needed you. The exact someone who I could exchange glances with, the one I could share awesome literature stuff with, and the person who shared music tastes with me so instantly. Everything for that matter, happened so instantly. From suddenly feeling sometimes lonely and clueless, I found direction and a much needed prod to to things that were right. From across the distance, you got me spectacularly well and time is witness to the fact that we, didn't let a boy come inbetween (thank god for that) Just as you constantly reminded me, he was just another boy, who did just the same thing as any other does. And after he left me too, I had you, to run back too.
Thank you for taking me back. And thank you for appreciating the little things which mattered so much to me which nobody saw but you. Thank you for the songs you played when we drank together. Thank you for those silent laughs which you just couldn't control, because they made me sit up straight and correct my act. Thank you for being the wisdom when I had none. Thank you for patiently showing me the right path Everysingletime. Thank you for showing me that no matter how much attention he gave me, at the end, he was a boy. And thank you for heart to heart, being that sister I never had.
I can never thank you enough for all that you've done or made me realize. Someday, you'll know the impact you've had on me :) But till then, I'll keep telling you.

Some people, come into your lives and go away as soon as they came, but some like you, have this insane capability of making people hold on to you. We can't do without you Arya :) it just doesn't happen.

And happy birthday love. Thank you for bringing my faith back in that word and showing me how much a Bhatia can rock ;)

I will always ALWAYS be by your side (whether you need me or not)

With love, hugs, kisses and other nasty things,
Ju

Smiley

This might sound funny. But this post is about a smiley faced lollipop.
Yes, it is as simple as it sounds. That piece of heaven I found smiling up at me in an unknown land. I rummaged through a mall, looked all around, found things and then gave up on them, for different reasons every time. But when I lay my eyes on this little candy, I couldn't look away. The more I tried, the more it just sat there and smiled at me. Okay well, let me tell you, I wasn't the only one, obviously. But nevertheless, it caught my eye. I've always had a thing for tiny lollipops, but this particular yellow smiley faced one man, there was something about it really. It didn't ask for my attention, but got it anyway. And when I finally held it in my hands, I found myself smiling too. And boy had it been real long since those muscles had had any movement at all. I opened the wrapper for the first time and I saw Him roll his eyes at me. 'She just needs a distraction' he thought.
Maybe, maybe that's all I needed. He'd never understand. He never had.
That didn't matter. I had you. For now at least.
And you were just right smiley. Not too sweet, and just that right amount of sour.
You lasted for a long time, more than I or anyone else expected you to last for. Through the bitter beer, through the nasty rum, your taste evened it out. Made it taste a little better. Just for a while. Everyone around me saw me getting addicted to you, going on and on about how awesome you were and even when I didn't, my face showed that happiness of a little girl who was ecstatic to find that lollipop after a long dose of bitter medicine.

But somewhere deep down, I knew smiley, I knew that you'd be gone, your sweet sourness will only be a thing I can think about and smile. So I took pictures of you, stole some from others, and kept reminding myself of the smile you brought on my face.

Lines from a song repeated in my head over and over again 'Like everything I've known, you'll disappear one day'

So I looked at you and kept you close to my heart. I didn't open the wrapper for the second time, I didn't dare to, cuz I knew you'd disappear soon enough.

So now, till now, I think of you, whenever life brings me down, whenever you're not around, cuz you brought back the lost child in me baby. You did :)

Angel set free..

For Jaymala Ma'am,

You left too soon, before we could say goodbye. 

We miss you Ma'am.. :(

A life of physical existence comes to an end,

We're left to ourselves, to fend,

Because you're here nomore,

But you've left a legacy behind to show,

that we are your students Ma'am, we will stand tall,

through it all, we will not fall.

You are alive within each one of us,

and You will be forever,

when things get tough,

and people say 'never',

You are the reason,

we'd stand up again,

through every season,

through sun or rain.

The confidence You gave us,

to solve every problem,

will remain etched in our minds,

like every logarithm.

Your smile,

it made us smile too.

Photographed in our hearts forever,

So divine, so true.

Your Open laugh,

still echoes in our ears,

And when you're looking from above,

You'll know we are fighting back tears..

If we, could come there too,

I know we would,

Back to learning physics,

Just for you, I wish we could.

This isn't only a dedication,

from us to you Ma'am,

It is also a compilation,

of every feeling we cram,

Into our little hearts,

of which you are a huge peice,

Yes, We miss you..

That is to say the least.

And when we are feeling down and low,

wondering why you had to go,

You'll still be here, 

shining, with your eternal glow

That light above the darkened seas,

the Star shining through the trees,

You are our angel, finally set free...